I got THE SMS … The one I usually get from my NM (narcissistic mother) that I get around every Christmas/New Year/Easter or Birthday …

It reads “Happy New Year K……. and D….. hope you had a great day thinking of you lots of love Mum xxx”

I had to commend her because she actually spelt my loving husbands name correctly this time … I still didn’t respond to it.

I did go cold when I saw it come through, I don’t know why as I half expected it around Christmas day.  I was going to delete it, like I have a few of the others but thought I would just leave it there in my phone, with a few of the others I haven’t replied too.

Being NC or No Contact has it’s good days and it’s bad days and when they reach out to us during the holidays, it’s only because they feel that they have to, plus, it gives them something to tell their friends/family/and anyone who will listen about it.  My NM can now complain that she messaged me and I didn’t respond, and that she has proof, as she can show them her phone …

Would it make any difference to me if she was reaching out any other time?  No, because over my 50 plus years I have given my NM more than enough chances and she has blown every single one of them … Plus, I know what she says about me to others, so why should I give her any more chances at all.  She’s never been my mother, she just gave birth to me … She’s never been a real grandmother to my daughter, just a name … We’ve done really well without her, just as she has without us …

So, if you have a narcissistic parent, be it a mother or father, sister or brother, or even a child, don’t be frightened of cutting ties for your own sanity … It is never easy, but it is better than the constant battle of them being in your life … Having a narc (or 2) in your family is difficult because you feel you have a loyalty to your family, but they have none to you, narcs only have loyalty to themselves … I understand how hard it is and so do others who are Narc Survivors … Take baby steps at first if you have to, but do it for your own sanity, it honestly does help! …

Take care xxx

©Narcissistic Truth & Klea